May 18, 2013

I’m along side the road. I’m really in a panic.

The truck broke down and I definitely ain’t no mechanic.

Lord knows I hate this. It’s really a pain.

Cars just zoom on by and man, it looks like rain.

Two tow trucks passed me by, guess they don’t need the business.

If I’m here much longer, I wonder if I’ll make that book by Guiness.

The milk of human kindness must be awful sour today.

T’ain’t nobody stoppin’ so along this road I’ll stay.

I’ve checked everything I know to see what’s got this old truck bugged.

Sittin’ just outside of Dallas, shoot, I’ll be glad if I don’t get mugged.

I’d leave the truck and walk, but someone might steal it.

I could use an old Penny Costal now to lay on hands and heal it.

To the County Mounties that pass me by, hey, I’m mighty beholdin’!

Hope they leave the doughnut shop someday and find their cruiser stolen!

Seems like forever as I sit and gripe and grouse

Till some good old boy stops and says he’ll gladly call my house.

My wife shows up and says, “Dahlin’ don’t pay the tow.

Honey, I’ll fetch you parts and goodies. You’ll make this old truck go!”

I plead and beg sayin’ “Baby, honey, please, I ain’t no blamed mechanic.”

She say, “Sugar, I have faith in you so sit here and just don’t panic.”

Is it the battery or is it the starter, beats the heck out of me.

Someone send a tow truck. I’ll gladly pay the fee.

Well, I didn’t want to work today, but there are things I’d rather do.

If you drive by here next Christmas, just wave and say howdy do!

If I am stuck here till I’m sixty or even eighty three,

There is just no way that you’ll make a mechanic out of me.

If you can fix this old Ranger, please give me some clues.

Until you do, I’ll be sittin’ here singin’ the breakdown blues!


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